2023 Pole Dancing Christmas Event

Leading up to Christmas, I started wearing my Santa hat and other Christmasy clothing out everywhere I went. I had a few different outfits, depending on the event. For exercise class, my leggings did the trick, but I saved the showiest Christmas attire for the upcoming show.

I’d written a Christmas show for my family as their gift. The first challenge was personalizing the event. I came up with five different sets of Candy Cane awards for each of my family members, based on either funny/traditional things that happened during past Christmases or things that were uniquely funny to the individual.

The second challenge was choosing a secular Christmas song that paired with the award. Yes, I’m well-aware that on the surface, “secular Christmas song” appears to be an oxymoron, but thanks to the internet, I had absolutely no problem finding nonreligious, Christmastime songs that paired with each award.

Next, I collaborated with the pole fitness studio where I’ve taken a variety of classes. They had never done an event like this. Outside of their regular classes, the studio hosted student-instructor showcases and private parties.

The two past showcases that I attended had Halloween and Christmas themes. Those free events allowed pole students to practice performing in front of an all-woman audience of family and friends while instructors used the opportunity to entice students to their classes.

Private parties, on the other hand, are 60 to 90-minute private pole fitness (pole/chair/floor/aerial) class where an instructor teaches a group of people who booked the event outside of the regular class schedule.

I knew for a fact that the private party was out. I could only envision one sister and one nephew being even remotely interested in taking a pole class. Yet, I knew all of them would enjoy being audience members.

The first pair of Candy Cane Awards went to the best Nana-Grandson dance. After showing the clip of those two dancing last Christmas, the first dancer performed to that classic hiphop tune, “Christmas in Hollis” by Run DMC.

The second pair of Candy Cane Awards went to the wordsmiths of the family, so the next performance was to Jasmine Rae’s “Christmas Alphabet.”

The third pair of Candy Cane Awards was for the Christmas chefs in the family. Fittingly, the next performance was to Snoop Dogg’s “Just Eat.”

The fourth pair of Candy Cane Awards was for the songstresses in the family. As an inside joke, the next performance was danced to Shonen Knife’s “Space Christmas.”

The last Candy Cane Award was dedicated to my 85 year-old father, a Vietnam Vet and real-live Superman. His song was danced to Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You.”

Another moment I knew that everyone was waiting for…pictures with the dancers.

I started off the picture parade with the dancers, all of whom were my instructors.

When I first started planning for this event, I predicted that one of my sisters and a nephew would probably be the only two who would want to learn a simple pole trick. My brother-in-law disproved that hypothesis.

We also had a few traditional Christmas pictures since there was a decorated tree, albeit topped with Hedwig from the Harry Potter series.

I directed my parents to take their traditional picture in front of the tree since we didn’t have one set up at home.

The very next group picture featured Dad. The most effort had been made to accommodate him.

As I explained to everyone, this was the first time Dad had been out of the house since mid April and it not be a doctor’s appointment.

I encouraged my nephew to take his group picture because this would be one of the rare times he’d be surrounded by women he’s not related to.

My brother-in-law, for all his initial spontaneous pole enthusiasm, took a straight pose with shades–as if he’d be disguised.

My nieces and nephew took a group picture together, warming up to the idea of posing solo with the dancers.

However, their mother was raring to go. She took a pose suggestion and then latched on.

Not to be outdone…

Now, the niece, who had modeling experience, finally warmed up to striking a pose.

I let it slip that my nephew did parkour, so the dancers stood back to check out his skills.

The pole was more of a challenge. The dancers helped a brother out.

Since her younger sister and brother had struck a pose, my other niece took her turn.

Last, but certainly not least, Mom wrapped her leg around the pole.

I don’t know who made the request, but I should have known better not to grab that pole. I’d written, produced and hosted the show. I had officially done enough at this point. The last thing I needed to do was climb the pole with those “teflon” stockings I was wearing, preventing me from climbing.

Now this was the only pose I should have attempted in the first place:

This was my first event with my new digital camera. With its blurry images and wonky cinematography, I call my first attempt “so bad it’s humorously good.” Enjoy!