As thrilling as the epic three-hour IMAX movie, The Odyssey, was the one line that resonated with me came in the middle of the movie: “I can save them from the gods, but not themselves.”
Without providing any spoiler context from the movie about who “the gods” nor who “themselves” are, I sat up in my seat just a little bit when I heard that line because I knew exactly what the character meant. When trying to help someone help themselves, you can smooth over all external obstacles so that person can be successful and they STILL fuck everything up in the end.
You may be able to influence the circumstances, but it’s much more challenging to change a person’s nature. Bad habits are hard to break, and the change has to come from within. As much as we can care for another, if they don’t break their own bad habits, there is no saving someone from themselves.
Too bad relationship drama isn’t so entertainingly projected on a large screen like a well-done epic movie. That would be a silver lining.
Instead, the experience drains both time and energy. During those times, I have to remind myself that I don’t have to carry such a burden.
The currently popular “Let Them Theory” advises one to let another person be who they are. That’s not a dismissal of the situation nor a capitulation to allow others to treat you any way they please. It’s a philosophy that guides you to accept others as they are when navigating through life.
What I’ve also found is that some people, instead of breaking a bad habit, will step back and allow others to do things for them. So, they adopt another bad habit, waiting to be enabled. Or manipulating others to enable them.
The truth is, we all die in the end. During our brief existence, we journey through life, accomplishing as much as we can. Or not.